Wednesday, July 7, 2010

A Year in the Life

My 23rd birthday is fast approaching. I feel like I've earned more than one birthday this year; so much has happened in the last 12 months that don't often happen to someone all at once.

I fell in love,
got engaged to the man of my dreams,
Graduated from college,
Moved my life across the country with hardly a few hundred dollars in the bank,
Got hired for my first real job teaching with real benefits and insurance(!),
Had my fiance break up with me,
Got in my first car accident,
Found a new church,
Bought my first car,
Learned to pay my own bills,
Said goodbye to my first group of students and school,
Now unemployed for the first time,
AND visited Central America for the first time.


Yep. Quite a bit in fewer than 12 months.

So in many ways, I'm back on square one, but on the other hand I'm a world away from who I used to be. It's been quite the journey to put a life together, especially when so much of my heart and so many of my dreams had been dashed to pieces... But God's grace has been transformative and instrumental. I want to thank those who have stayed by my side through it all: especially my mom, my bible study girls, my friend and roommate Courtney, and the awesome teachers, staff and students at Horizon.

I bought a book today called "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" And although it sounds dumb, it's actually a fantastic book of beautiful questions. I hope to get back into writing and do some serious self-evaluation by blogging about the topics that the book raises. Join me in thinking about these things, if you'd like. I'm also excited to introduce some of these questions to my future students--whoever they are.

Thanks for being patient with me, blogging world. I hope I'm back.

Betsy Joy

Friday, July 24, 2009

Lately.

Hello, blog-world.

It has been a while. I say this regretfully-- so much has happened since my last post, I can't even begin to describe all that God has been doing lately.

Let's just say that I've seen God's faithfulness, perfect timing and love come together to give me a most precious gift.

Danny and I have been dating about three and a half months now, and every day is a confirmation that we are meant for each other. The distance is hard-- but our friendship and companionship is thriving and our love is growing daily.

We knew from the very beginning that this was big-- really big-- and that it was from God. I've had a lot of convictions that resulted in amazing experiences, and when I found Danny, I had the biggest conviction about him that I'd ever felt. That was a clue. ;)

There are the skeptics: people I used to be. That love at first sight (or site
, haha) was only in the movies; that you can't really know a person when you've never been with them; that there could be more than one person out there for you; you can't trust someone you've met on a free dating site.

Or there are closer friends and family who've been skeptical: I didn't need to find a boyfriend online, so I must be desperate; I'm jealous of my friends engagements and so things have been rushed; or because it's online it's not a "real" relationship, it's just convenient for me for when I want him.

My answer to all the skeptics: False. All false.

Yes, I've heeded the warnings and I'm careful. But what Danny and I have is far bigger and far more wonderful than either of us ever planned on or imagined. These things don't come along every day, and there's no way I'm passing him up ;)

God is good. And I hope you'll be happy for me! I have such joy in the Lord because of Danny's presence in my life. Danny is helping me become a much better woman and yet I am always completely myself with him. Doesn't get much better than that :)

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In other news, I've been working at the Christian Reformed Home Missions office this summer. I love my job-- It has gotten me so excited about ministry and church planting! I am really blessed with both the great opportunity to serve but also a regular full-time income. This weekend I am headed to North Carolina for a convention as a vendor representing HM! Pretty cool!

In another month I'll be starting my last semester(!) at Calvin!! I can't wait to be done, although I do love the professors and enjoy the academics. I'm taking 15 credits-- 12 that are required and an extra 3 "for fun." I hope, for a number of reasons, that this semester goes by quickly! Between classes, working at the Prince Conference Center, homework, church and a long-distance relationship, I think I'll stay pretty busy :)

Blessings, friends. I'll try to update again soon.

Betsy



Monday, April 13, 2009

A Sestina for Dad

A Sestina* For Dad
For Dewey Vandenberg
15 February 1953--28 October 2004


There, in the living room, my dad
sleeps under a thin sheet. A nurse from home
hospice care motions to my mom, and they speak
in low tones, both knowing it’s time
to prepare for the end of his sickness.
I’d rather forget,

but can never forget,
his graying hair or my dad’s
sunken cheeks, or the way he was sick
for years, and now he’ll never leave our home
again. As days blur together into weeks, time
passes quietly, since he can barely speak.

But this is hardly new; for years we hardly spoke
and I know he hasn’t forgotten
my harsh words to him, like the time
when I screamed and hit my dad
again and again when we left home
one day. I was so angry that he was sick.

I, too, was sick
of dealing with the sadness every time he spoke
about how he’d miss us, miss this home.
He didn’t want us to forget
about him, about our own dad--
but he understood the erosion of time.

It’s worth remembering those times
when he was still healthy, not weak or sick,
and recall the enthusiasm and delight of my dad’s
laughter and jokes. Or, when he’d speak
to us about certain childhood joys almost forgotten;
those memories reverberate on the walls of our home.

My siblings and I laugh. They’re home
and we all wait together, passing the time
with games and casseroles given to us by others, names forgotten,
who also mourned while my dad was sick.
Their quiet gifts and countless Hallmark cards spoke
volumes about the ministry and widespread influence of my dad.

But now-- now my dad is in his heavenly Home
and I speak less about those times
of his sickness, but my heart cannot forget.


B. Vandenberg
April 2009



*A sestina is a form of poetry with six stanzas and an envoy that repeat six words throughout the piece at the end of each line, in a specific order. The poetry class just learned about this today, and I was intrigued by it and decided to give it a try. I'm amazed at what truths can reveal themselves even in (because of?) a tightly controlled form.