growing up

is spiritual growth when you start to get the point?
(maybe. but i'd be more apt to say that it's when you start making the point a habit.)


At any rate, I'd say that the last couple weeks have been... enlightening. reaffirming. encouraging. convincing.


I hardly know how to put it in words, what this deep rooted conviction means for me. I just know what it is propelling me towards. I know that my life is going to be one bent towards ministry. There is no other option for me now. Whatever I do, in terms of employment, it will also be my form of ministry. Perhaps not formal (although some of that too) it is still my vocation.

This means that I will be a servant. I want to volunteer regularly in the Grand Rapids community, for the sake of helping other people. I believe that my life, gifts, abilities are not my own; Christ asks me to give them away and to use them for the building upkeep of his Kingdom.

This means that I am dedicated. My work is going to be important to me, and I mean my studies. I'm doing the honors program at Calvin because that will keep me accountable for maintaining grades, GPA, and pushing myself to explore knowledge--and His Creation--in a deep and meaningful way.

It means I rise up to the challenges. Honestly, the thought of applying for dorm leadership next year scares me. But I can't deny that I have felt a push towards that direction, to at least try. There was a sermon message I heard about leadership at the Glasgow WestEnd Vineyard a few weeks back which was so powerful. I reflected on how God calls you to be YOURSELF, and that if you deny who you are, than how can He use you? My characterstics, my personality, and my goals all point to my future involvement in leadership. I need to step up to that, or else I am not fulfilling what I was called to.

And it means I will strive to become disciplined. My walk with God has been less than what it could be, to say the least. I want to know Him more, yet I want to know Him so well that He is the Lover of my soul. Yeah, I want to be intimate. I want to look to Him as my Source of worship, my Inspiration, the Inexhaustible Theme (good words from a song!) I don't want to be disciplined for the sake of being disciplined; that would be foolish. I want to be disciplined because it will help me become stronger in the areas that I am so weak. Christ has the power to wipe those weaknesses away, but He gives us the freedom to choose whether or not we will make that decision to be close to Him.

Praises be to the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. May He bless you and keep you, both now and always.

♥Betsy Joy