Eros, CS Lewis, and grief.

For it is the very mark of Eros that when he is in us we had rather share unhappiness with the Beloved than be happy on any other terms. Even if the two lovers are mature and experienced people who know that broken hearts heal in the end and can clearly foresee that, if they once steeled themselves to go through the present agony of parting, they would almost certainly be happier ten years hence than marriage is at all likely to make them--even then, they would not part. To Eros all these calculations are irrevelant.....even when it becomes clear beyond all evasion that marriage with the Beloved cannot possibly lead to happiness--when it cannot even profess to offer any other life than that of tending an incurable invaled, of hopeless poverty, of exile, or of disgrace--Eros never hesitates to say, "Better this than parting. Better to be miserable with her than happy without her. Let our hearts break provided they break together." If the voice within us does not say this, it is not the voice of Eros.

~"Eros," CS Lewis, The Four Loves (p107)


Funny, how CS Lewis articulates very much the same thing that I tried describing to Erin, Heidi, and Eric this past week.


Betsy