Fellowship of the Unashamed

"I'm part of the fellowship of the unashamed. I have the Holy Spirit power. The die has been cast. I have stepped over the line. The decision has been made- I'm a disciple of his. I won't look back, let up, slow down, back away, or be still. My past is redeemed, my present makes sense, my future is secure. I'm finished and done with low living, sight walking, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tamed visions, worldly talking, cheap giving, and dwarfed goals. I no longer need preeminence, prosperity, position, promotions, plaudits, or popularity. I don't have to be right, first, tops, recognized, praised, regarded, or rewarded. I now live by faith, lean in his presence, walk by patience, am uplifted by prayer, and I labor with power. My face is set, my gait is fast, my goal is heaven, my road is narrow, my way rough, my companions are few, my Guide reliable, my mission clear. I cannot be bought, compromised, detoured, lured away, turned back, deluded, or delayed. I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the presence of the enemy, pander at the pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of mediocrity. I won't give up, shut up, let up, until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up, paid up, preached up for the cause of Christ. I am a disciple of Jesus. I must go till he comes, give till I drop, preach till all know, and work till he stops me. And, when he comes for his own, he will have no problem recognizing me. . . my banner will be clear" -Prayer known as the Martyred Zimbabwe Pastor's Prayer


A friend told me, earlier, "I love the fact that you get so easily amazed, and aren't ashamed to share with me." I don't know if he's just entertained by my enthusiasm about whatever it is I get started talking about (because this was after I described some amazing things I just saw on those Planet Earth documentaries, which are enough to take my breath away) or if he really does appreciate it ;) He's not intimidated by my big dreams and passion for whatever my future holds-- although some people are. Today my dreaming takes me somewhere around the world with a CRWRC 24-month Internship. It sounds exactly like something that I would love to/should do. It fits my heart and vocational goals like a glove. We'll see... :)

I think that I can echo the virgin mary by saying that i'm pondering all of these dreams in my heart; I have to let them sit.
But these dreams act as a kind of undercurrent to my life, shifted by the Holy Spirit, drawing me towards whatever future the dreams press towards. I need there to be movement, though. For a while, things were stagnant. I need to mix the pot every now and then and look back on all the dreams I've had and brainstorm some of the things I'd like to do. I like storing things in an "opportunities" folder, because even though I don't do many of them, they often act as stepping stones towards the things I actually DO act on!


Today's worship at MCC was wonderful. After singing a few great songs, a bunch of us headed over to Hope Lodge to prepare meals for the residents there. Many of the people staying there were home for the holidays, but it gave us plenty of opportunity to prepare SEVEN different things in the kitchen to put in the freezer for when they come back! It was good "family time" for MCC, and I got to know some of the ladies better that way :) I hope we do it again, it was fun!

The songs were appropriate, because most of them were about offering even in uncertainty. It's bugging me that I can't remember the song we sang right before "Enough"... it was so appropriate and I can't remember which one it was! The lyrics are on the tip of my tongue. Oh well :) It was the realization that what I want to do is besides the point, rather, it's about God wants to do with my life, and I need to follow His lead-- but also to take the initiative to do so.


On a somewhat different note:

The last few days, I have been more in tune with the way that everything is spiritual. It's like having a different set of eyes with which to see. Obviously everything is spiritual whether or not we're aware of it, but being aware--even for a while--is a fascinating thing.




I think this has been influenced significantly by the book that I'm reading right now, called The Cloister Walk by Kathleen Norris. It's a unique piece of literature-- as the Boston Globe puts it, it is "A strange and beautiful book. Part memoir, part meditation, it is a remarkable piece of writing. If read with humility and attention...[it] becomes lectio divina, or holy reading." My experience exactly. If you enjoy writing poetry, it is especially a treat.

Here is just one quote that I read today that illuminates the mystery of faith:

"[We should consider]...the notion that one might grow into faith much as one writes a poem. It takes time, patience, discipline, a listening heart. There is precious little certainty, and often great struggling, but also joy in our discoveries. This joy we experience, however, is not visible or quantifiable; we have only the words and form of the poem, the results of our exploration" (61).



Praise God from whom all blessings flow,
Praise Him all creatures here below,
Praise Him above ye heavenly hosts,
Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost.
AMEN!


Betsy Joy